The novel coronavirus broke into our house last week. We thought we had secured the perimeter with all of our face masks and disinfectant wipes. I slept relatively peacefully believing that the threat was OUT THERE and not IN HERE. We washed our hands and covered our coughs. We maintained a strict 6ft social distance from everyone outside of our immediate household. Every grocery item and all delivered mail and packages were disinfected before they crossed the threshold. And we limited carry-out food to once a week. Despite all that, Allan was diagnosed in the emergency department of a local hospital with COVID-19 last Thursday.
Fortunately, his case appears manageable remotely from home while sequestered upstairs to one single room. No hospital admission. That’s good. Of course, that room is our master bedroom and the connected bathroom with the only currently functioning shower. That’s bad. You see, the plumbing in our hall bathroom tub/shower busted at the start of Ohio’s self-isolation over a month ago. Allan would not permit an outside contractor into the house to repair it, citing “an abundance of caution”. Yes, he rues that decision in hindsight now. Yes, I have reminded him of this several times since.
Crumbs, cussing and coolers.
All of the remaining bedrooms in our home are currently taken up by children who belong to us. As a result, I am residing for the foreseeable future out of one laundry basket in the living room. Last night I felt so drained. So, I just tucked the fitted sheet in over some discarded Cheez-it crumbs and dog fur sheddings. (By the way, Fido… If you are going to break house rules and jump up onto the couch, eat the dang crumbs, okay? Please and thank you.)
Similarly, I didn’t even bother picking up the last of Luke’s toys strewn around the room. Natural consequences came back to bite me in the butt (foot). I paid for my poor choice in the middle of the night as I got up to use the downstairs restroom. I stepped barefoot with my full weight onto a Duplo block. Cuss words were said. Many of them. Those evil, colorful chunks HURT!
We are making sure that Allan has what he needs to stay hydrated and nourished without compromising our safety. We leave beverages, food and medicine for him on request in a single red Igloo cooler just outside his room. Then we knock on the door and walk away before he opens the door and breaks the barrier. Allan later returns any dirty dishes to the empty cooler so we can sanitize them in a special cycle in our dishwasher. At the end of each night, the cooler gets sprayed down with a bleach solution and returned to its sentry position to await the next day’s exchanges.
somewhere else, something better
To keep myself entertained, sometimes I pretend I am somewhere else doing something better. For instance, I may imagine I am a daring spy on a covert mission making a drop to another clandestine agent. Or other times I might envision myself as the chief officer in a gulag guarding an international political prisoner. No… wait! How about a zookeeper in charge of some large, formerly extinct animal species? In reality most of the time I am just a tired wife and mother with no bra and no make-up trying to hold everything together. Did I sponge bathe today, or was that yesterday? And how many days in a row have I worn these same leggings? Wait – what DAY is this?!?
Yes, I know I am a grown woman pretending in her mind to be a spy, a warden or a zookeeper. Truthfully I am running out of options, and I need to pace myself. I have already consumed essentially every refined sugar and salty snack in the house. Thank goodness I didn’t get rid of my bigger pants last Fall when I lost twenty-five pounds. I have since found those pounds and a few more besides. I do enjoy a glass of wine here and there, but not every time I need to relax or escape the situation. (I’d be pickled). You cope your way, and I’ll cope mine.
threatened by an invisible enemy
Thankfully we have never been on the receiving end of a literal criminal break-in. I can only imagine how violating that must feel – to have your safety and security rattled in your own home. Our house has always been an oasis for me. In other words, a sanctuary where I can exhale, recharge and be authentically me without judgment. Except now I sense danger where I didn’t perceive risk before. Coronavirus broke into our house, and the invisible enemy has invaded our territory. It has crossed our threshold to physically threaten our family’s health and emotionally steal our peace.
I know from past experience that all this crushing and pressing will bring “new wine”. I wrote about that very thing a few weeks ago (HERE). In fact, there is already new wine starting to spill over for me. Still, I’m not ready to write about those revelations yet. I need to unpack them first. Some are lighthearted and funny. Some are sweet and tender. And frankly, some of them are hard pills to swallow. Bottom line, I need to process them before I share them. Look for those thoughts coming in the next few blog posts!
Coronavirus broke into our house, but we are fighting back. It’s GAME ON.
Header image by Steffen Salow from Pixabay
